Why nurturing independence is important for young children

Independence – Why Learning to Be Independent Is Essential for a Child’s Growth

From the moment a baby enters the world, their natural mission is to become independent. Each small step toward independence gives a child a deep sense of accomplishment and fuels their development.

We begin to see signs of this independence early on in the simplest actions. Once a baby is no longer in the womb, they have a body—and mind—separate from their mother. As days go by, they discover that their limbs, fingers, and movements belong to them. Even a simple gesture like pointing to a desired object is an early expression of an independent mind forming its own intentions.

Movement is another powerful milestone. The first attempts at crawling show independence on two levels: the child decides where they want to go (independence of thought), and they use their body (independence of movement) to get there. By around thirteen months, many children walk on their own. Anyone who has watched a toddler protest being picked up—because they were heading toward a jar of candies—has witnessed this strong drive for independence. As Maria Montessori beautifully described, when a young child learns to walk, it is almost as if they are saying, “Now I’m gone. Goodbye, parent.”

Around this same time, language blossoms. Children begin building vocabulary, gaining a new tool to express desires, needs, and observations without relying entirely on an adult. Combined with independent movement, this newfound ability to communicate gives them significant control over their daily experiences.

Independence, therefore, is embedded in our human nature. The question becomes: Why and how do we nurture this natural trait?

Let us address the first. The positive effects of independence are profound.

• It builds self-esteem: A child who can do things for themselves feels capable and valued.

• It strengthens self-awareness: They learn what they can do and where their strengths lie.

• It encourages healthy risk-taking: Even small risks—pouring water, climbing a step, choosing an activity—help them discover new abilities.

• It develops resilience and problem solving: Experiencing small setbacks such as a fall while risk taking, is a valuable lesson in resilience, adaptability and problem solving.

• It reinforces confidence: Each successful risk boosts pride, satisfaction, and a deeper belief in themselves.

These qualities—confidence, resilience, curiosity, and self-satisfaction—are not just important for older children; they are powerful gifts even for the very young. It is important for adults to understand this, set aside their own convenience and provide opportunities to young children, with greater risks for older ones, to exercise independence.