Respect in a classroom

This week, I find myself returning to the theme of respect. We often talk about respect at home, but respect takes on a special meaning inside a Montessori classroom. With twenty or so children between the ages of three and six, or older, respect is not just an idea — it is something we practice every day. It is at the very heart of Montessori education.

So what does respect look like in a Montessori classroom?

• It starts at the door. When a child walks in, we meet them at their level — quite literally. We kneel down, make eye contact, offer a warm handshake and a smile. Maybe we ask a small, personal question: “How was your birthday party on the weekend?” or “I noticed you have your favorite tuque on!” These moments say, I see you. You matter.

• It shows in how we speak. We use gentle tones and thoughtful language. Our body language is calm and open. Children are incredibly perceptive; they know when they are being rushed, dismissed, or talked down to. They also know when they are being spoken to with genuine respect.

• It comes through when we offer choices.We don’t tell a child what to work on, the moment they walk in. We give them time to settle in so they may greet a friend or share something with them. When we observe that they are ready to start the day, we ask them how they would like to start. If a child is undecided, we may offer them some choices. It may seem simple, but the message is powerful: Your decisions count. When a child feels that their voice matters, confidence takes root.

• It appears in the quiet protection of concentration. One of the greatest signs of respect in a Montessori classroom is not interrupting a child who is deeply focused. Just as we wouldn’t barge into a colleague’s office mid-task, we allow the child the same dignity. The classroom has a gentle hum — busy, but calm — because everyone understands that concentration is valuable. We step in only when help is needed or requested. Educators are specially trained in the art of intervention.

• It lives in how the children treat one another. Over time, you begin to see something remarkable. Children start speaking gently to each other, offering help, waiting patiently, laughing together without unkind teasing. Spontaneity is still there — plenty of giggles and joyful whispers — but it is kindness that sets the tone. No one is made to feel small.

• It is even built into the materials. Dr. Montessori designed the learning materials so children can see their own mistakes and correct them independently. They do not have to look to an adult for approval or correction every step of the way. This builds confidence, patience, and genuine pride in their work.

Respect in a Montessori classroom is not a rule posted on the wall. It is a way of moving, speaking, guiding, and stepping back. It is lived, moment by moment — by the children, and by us. It is not perfect every moment, of course not. There are giggles, little disagreements, learning curves and conversations along the way. Yet through it all, respect remains the thread tying everyone together. It helps children become not only capable learners, but also kind and thoughtful human beings.